Middle School 8th grade graduation
in North Phoenix.
Longest Walk Yet: Graduation Chaos, Dragon Shrub Memories & Trees With Better Hair Than Me
Walk 1 of 5 for the week of May 17 is officially complete.
And apparently I chose “middle school graduation morning” as the perfect day to go wandering through the neighborhood.
Today’s walk turned into one of those accidental documentary episodes where absolutely everything was happening at once.
There were parents everywhere. Cars everywhere. District vehicles. Graduation traffic jams.
Moon Valley High School band students performing the ceremony music.
School officials doing dignitary schtick.
Families dressed up in graduation clothes trying to navigate Arizona heat while searching for parking spots that no longer existed. And creating their own.
Meanwhile I’m over here in my red shirt, carrying iced coffee, narrating tree personalities to myself while attempting to survive direct sunlight.
According to the weather app:
73 degrees.
According to the back of my neck:
approximately the surface temperature of a toaster oven.
The breeze honestly felt amazing whenever the clouds rolled through, but every time the sun broke loose again it immediately reminded me who was in charge.
The clouds today were absolutely gorgeous though. Huge rolling white clouds drifting across bright blue sky all morning long. Some moments looked cool and calm and breezy.
Other moments felt like the sky itself was trolling me.
And naturally Spotify decided to contribute to the situation by planting Ray Charles singing “Mess Around” directly into my head while the clouds and sunshine kept switching places every thirty seconds.
Honestly? Perfect soundtrack.
Fitbit Stats — Longest Walk Yet
This walk ended up becoming my longest single walking session so far.
Walk Totals:
2 hours 15 minutes
2.79 miles
6,485 walk steps
6,679 total steps so far today
571 calories burned during the walk
35 active zone minutes
Average heart rate: 97 bpm
What makes me happiest honestly isn’t speed.
It’s consistency.
My heart rate stayed remarkably steady most of the walk despite the changing heat, graduation traffic, random stop-and-go pacing, photo breaks, and Starbucks break in the middle.
That matters.
The Fitbit summary actually called out:
endurance improvement,
pace control,
and better heat management compared to previous hotter walks.
That right there is the entire point of the Starbucks Carrot Method.
Not punishment.
Not perfection.
Not “go harder until you hate exercise.”
Walk Receipts
Just slowly building a sustainable relationship with movement through real life.
Dragon Shrub: Gone But Never Forgotten
The landscapers were working on poor Dragon Shrub today.
His head was removed! 😱🤯😭
Dragon Shrub has appeared in countless Starbucks Carrot Method walks over time and honestly became part of the route mythology at this point.
He looked like several orange trees and climbing vines somehow merged together into the shape of a dragon head and neck.
On cloudy days, especially before rain, the sky behind him made it look like smoke was coming out of his nostrils.
During flowering season the vines exploded into yellow blooms that looked like some kind of golden ceremonial dragon cloak.
Absolutely magnificent accidental plant engineering.
At least there’s picture proof he existed.
That’s one thing these walks do: ordinary neighborhood objects slowly become characters in the story.
The Great Cheato Mesquite Landscaping Debacle
We are also still emotionally recovering from:
“The Great Cheato Mesquite Landscaping Debacle.”
The mesquite trees got heavily trimmed last week and the neighborhood birds are NOT thrilled about it.
Normally there are hummingbirds, finches, and assorted tiny feathered chaos goblins flying around those trees constantly.
Since the landscaping happened?
Everybody’s hiding.
The birds have retreated into witness protection mode while the trees themselves currently look like somebody gave them an aggressively practical haircut.
You know when someone technically gets a good haircut but your brain still goes: “…but where did their personality go?”
That.
Aquanet Tree Remains Iconic
Thankfully the Aquanet Tree continues holding the line.
From the street this pine tree still looks exactly like giant teased 1980s bangs frozen in time with three industrial cans of Aqua Net hairspray.
And the wildest part? It’s literally a pine tree.
Not a decorative sculpted tree.
Not Grandma’s perfect Christmas tree.
Not fancy landscaping.
Just one pine tree out here somehow channeling full glam rock energy.
Honestly if Bon Jovi became a plant, this would probably be the result.
Palm Tree Highlight Season
Meanwhile my palm tree appears to have entered its “summer highlights era.”
The giant pale blooms sticking out everywhere genuinely look like the tree went to a salon and asked for layered blonde highlights.
Arizona plants really do start developing personalities after a while.
Neighborhood Character Roll Call
Today’s walk included:
district vans,
Washington Elementary School District vehicles,
graduation crowds,
wandering families,
random traffic backups,
sidewalk congestion,
and Starbucks doing its best impersonation of Pets on Parade.
Sweat Level: Cat Hair Hazard
Despite the cool breeze and beautiful cloud cover, I ended this walk absolutely drenched.
Not “healthy glow” drenched.
More like: “accidentally walked through rainstorm” drenched.
At one point I had to strategically avoid the cats when I got home because every cat owner understands the danger zone where sweat plus floating cat fur equals immediate transformation into a partially felted craft project.
One affectionate cat headbutt and I would’ve turned into the Abominable Snowman.
Still Counts
But the walk got done.
That’s the important part.
Not perfect weather. Not perfect pacing.
Not fitness influencer nonsense.
Just a real-life walk through a real neighborhood full of graduation traffic, weird trees, dramatic skies, roadie pickup trucks, birds hiding from landscapers, and one sweaty woman carrying iced coffee while trying not to become velcro for cat hair.
And honestly?
That still counts.
Do you want to read about more walks?
Starbucks Carrot Method – North Phoenix Walking Series
Steps for Sips at Weekly Reads